Online dating can feel like a lifeline, meeting new people, swapping stories, maybe even feeling sparks fly. But it seems the digital world isn’t always hearts and roses. Romance scams are on the rise. They target people of all ages, but older adults, especially those who are recently widowed or divorced, appear particularly vulnerable. Scammers reportedly know that loneliness can make people more trusting and that having savings makes them a bigger target. Romance scams prey on emotions more than money. They might appear charming, caring, or attentive. But experts say vigilance, research, and slow decision-making are crucial.As reported, Beatrice, in her late 60s, met a man online during the COVID-19 pandemic. He wasn’t George Clooney, but he resembled her late husband, who had died months earlier. It seemed comforting. Someone to talk to, to fill the quiet hours. Until things started to feel off.
What are romance scams: The first signs you might miss
It often begins slowly and starts with friendly chats at first, small talk, compliments. Scammers might claim they work abroad or have a high-status, glamorous job. They send photos, sometimes fake, AI-generated, sometimes stolen from other people. Their goal is totally on to gain your trust and make you feel special.It seems minor at first. But then they start dropping hints of love or affection unusually quickly. Weeks instead of months. Suddenly, you feel emotionally invested. And that’s when the financial requests begin, which sometimes start small and gradually grow shockingly large.Older adults are often the main targets. The Federal Trade Commission reported nearly 70,000 victims of romance scams in 2022 alone, with almost $240 million lost. That’s reportedly a big increase from previous years.
Warning signs you might be targeted
There are subtle red flags:
- If someone quickly professes love, it might be a warning. If they avoid video calls or give endless excuses for not meeting in person. If they push to move conversations off the dating platform to WhatsApp, Telegram, or email, that’s another.
- Requesting money: Especially cryptocurrency, gift cards, or wire transfers, that’s a major one to look upon.
- Experts also point out combative behaviour when questioned, inconsistent stories, or minimal online presence as key indicators.
- Even grammar mistakes can be a clue, particularly if they claim to be fluent in English.
- And sometimes, banks will alert you if suspicious activity is detected. It might feel awkward. Embarrassing even. But it’s a red flag worth heeding.
How scammers collect money
Sometimes they prefer payment methods that are hard to reverse. Cryptocurrency and bank wires top the list, gift cards come next. Payment apps like PayPal or Venmo are used less often. The common factor: once the money is sent, it’s nearly impossible to get it back.Experts say falling victim isn’t a sign of weakness. Scammers are highly manipulative, often working in organised groups with pre-written scripts. They know how to exploit emotions, particularly loneliness and grief.
How to stay safe from romance scams online
- Go slowly and ask questions.
- Observe inconsistencies.
- Keep conversations on the dating platform at first and limit what you share online.
- Reverse image searches for photos can help and always trust your gut.
If something feels off, it probably is.
- Talk to someone you trust about your online connections.
- Report suspicious behaviour to the platform.
- Notify law enforcement if needed.
- The Homeland Security Investigations (HSI) Tip Line reportedly helps people report potential romance scams and stay anonymous if they want.
