Destination weddings now have their own dress codes. Here’s how to crack them.

As ceremonies have become less traditional and more personal, typical dress codes are being replaced by themes that are less straightforward. Increasingly, destinations that hold meaning for couples are being used as inspiration.

Danielle Dworkowitz, owner of Creative Touch Party Design in Palm Beach, Fla., has noticed the trend. Of the couples Dworkowitz works with, more than half now want events with location-specific dress codes—twice as many as in 2019, she said.

The dress code chosen by Nettles, a librarian, and her fiancé, Jordan Chowdhury, a 34-year-old chauffeur, leans into the architecture of their venue: a Tuscan-style villa in Jonestown, Texas. It’s not far from where the couple, who recently moved to Chicago, previously lived.

To make sure their loved ones understand the assignment, the couple tapped Kati Kons, owner of Portrait of a Bride on Fire in Washington, D.C., who specializes in nontraditional weddings. Kons’s services, which vary by project, cost the couple $2,500.

In addition to channeling la dolce vita, Nettles and Chowdhury want their roughly 150 guests to wear white at their September wedding. They plan to wear colorful outfits, and want to stand out.

Kons helped them curate a shopping guide with links to clothing and accessories that guests could purchase, ranging from a $50 patterned scarf to a $400 Bonobos blazer to a $768 Veronica Beard jacket.

The stylist also made a mood board for guests to reference, which featured fabrics, garment types, accessories and shoes. Mood boards work best, Kons says, when they show inspiration that reflects a variety of ages, body types and backgrounds, so that people of all stripes can better picture themselves in the desired attire.

“We’ve had some people being like, ‘This is a lot to ask,’ ” Nettles said. “But it’s also our wedding, and we’re allowed to ask.”

Lichtman, a 39-year-old real-estate broker, and Murray, a 33-year-old managing director at a talent management company, originally described their dress code to guests as “a campy nostalgic” upstate vibe “with a mix of Met Gala,” Murray said. “Nobody understood that.” A mood board made by the couple, who live in Brooklyn, also wasn’t much help.

So they took another tack, emailing a memo to their 160 guests with directives like “colorful, expressive and playful,” and “dresses, jumpsuits, pantsuits, sets and separates, vintage treasures, bold accessories, unexpected combinations.” Special attention was paid to shoes, Murray said. “I don’t know how many times I had to say, ‘Stilettos aren’t going to work, wear your funky footwear.’ ”

The effort paid off. Murray recalled her wedding planner, Hilary Smith of H. Smith and Co. in Narrowsburg, N.Y., saying that she had never seen a better-dressed crowd. “The best compliment,” Murray said.

The couple saw their dress code as more flexible than a traditional one like black tie, Murray added. “When you lean into various formalities that causes more constriction and stress for the guests,” she said, explaining that guidelines for their wedding attire encouraged people to shop their own closets. “If you have something that you’ve been waiting for an excuse to wear, bring it, that’s what you should wear.”

“I definitely wanted it to be a little more formal,” said Grace, a personal trainer. The couple, who live in Denver, went with “Hollywood Western”—a nod to how they met as college students in California and made many visits to Hollywood together.

They wanted their 120 guests to get creative, so they intentionally kept guidelines loose, offering just one sentence of direction: “Embrace the western spirit—dress to impress like you’re walking the red carpet, or go for old wild-west saloon-wear.”

Another way the Rainaldis helped their guests dress on theme: The venue they booked for their party, Brush Creek Ranch, has an on-site hat bar where guests could buy custom cowboy hats, which started at $235.

Fur coats and fringe jackets were popular choices among attendees. The groom’s godfather dressed up as Woody from “Toy Story.” The couple also made it clear to guests that wearing on-theme clothing they already owned was acceptable.

“It was super important to us at the wedding that we weren’t forcing people to buy stuff just for this,” Ross said. “If you go into a thrift store or a vintage store, like half the stuff there fits the theme.”

For their May 2025 nuptials in Kona, Hawaii, they hired a local planner, Kate Hickey, owner of Sunshower Weddings.

In settling on their destination dress code, they embraced one of Hickey’s tricks of the trade: She often incorporates the word “Hawaii” into the theme as a way to direct guests away from anything too stuffy.

The couple, who live in Los Angeles, had further instructions to their 76 guests on their wedding website: men should wear dark suits without ties, and women should wear gowns in lightweight fabrics that hit at or below the ankle.

Not wanting to blend in with their 110 guests, Alexandra, 28, and Alexander, 30, provided guidelines explaining that their Palm Beach chic theme was a variation on the attire typically associated with the enclave—instead of bright colors, guests were encouraged to wear whites and neutrals with beachy details.

Their guidelines offered a clear direction of the couple’s interpretation of “chic”—a word that is often used for dress codes, but can mean very different things.

Shell-shaped purses, crochet and feather pantsuits, and a beaded flamingo clutch were among the ways attendees interpreted the theme, Alexandra said. “Everyone really leaned into it.”